In my last blog, Kissing Karacters, I wrote about horrible kissers. Our lesson on Kissing continues. From my book, “Meet Me Under The Eiffel Tower”:
“Lips are a very sensual part of the body…Think of all the things they do for you! There are many nerve endings in the lips. There are 34 facial muscles and a hundred and twelve postural muscles used during a kiss. Didn’t know you were exercising did you? 🙂
“Studies also indicate that prolonged kissing reduces stress and lowers your cholesterol. It should be part of your new health plan! The skin of the entire body, covered by more than four million sensory receptors, suggests you should spend a whole lot of productive time with each other kissing, well…everywhere! Again, it is just plain healthy! ”
Of course, we may be getting ahead of ourselves here. Let’s just start with that first kiss. I’ve never cared much for that first date, feeling a little nervous about what (I assumed it would happen) that first kiss at the door would be like. So if the date is going well, if you are both relating well, laughing and at ease, if all the signs are there, why not celebrate with a kiss? It would knock the whole anxious anticipation out of your mind.
In “Meet Me Under The Eiffel Tower” I mention a few good kissers. Good Kissers seem to possess good radar that suggests to them if and when they should kiss a woman. It isn’t necessarily reserved for that “thing at the door” at the end of the date. In my book I talk about my first kiss in Paris and I felt so high on nitric oxide (read about it in my book) that I just initiated it myself at the dinner table. Remember Keanu Reeves in “Something’s Got To Give” when he took Diane Keaten out to dinner and he leaned slowly in to kiss her at the dinner table? Huba Huba! That man can lay his shoes under my bed anytime! Once, at a concert in the park, a man I had known for awhile and mainly an evolving friend, found his way to lightly, gently, kiss my lips. We were so in the moment. Neither of us tried to rush forward with more than a slight brush of the lips and a look into each others eyes. And yet, here I am, years later, remembering that gentle meeting of the souls. Ah yes, I still think about it. Subtlety can be very sexy. It is an art, not a skill.
Granted, kissing holds a promise, a hope of things to come but kissing should not be used for seduction. What comes before the kiss should be seductive. Kissing should merely be in the moment with no hidden agenda. Men tend to get this at the beginning of a relationship and somewhere along the journey in that relationship it is lost, most particularly when sex enters the scenario. Horror of horrors, after sex enters into a relationship couples tend to kiss less, as if they don’t want to be bothered with the preliminaries. BIG MISTAKE. Be bothered! And don’t just save kissing for the purpose of arousal. Really, kissing in its most loving, pure form is the nurturing of another human being.
So, here is your homework assignment: If you are in a relationship, kiss for an hour or more with no other intentions. Then, fully nurtured, cuddle and fall asleep in each other’s arms. What a way to go…